Sunday, November 11, 2012

Second Coming


One day I want to be really great. I want to write every day and live in a place that inspires me to take pictures of everything, even of the stairs to the subway. I want to be able to cook dinners for my friends in a small flat in Paris, maybe asparagus and lemon, and serve it in mismatched plates on a street lit balcony. I want to learn more languages and meet a boy who reads more than he talks and have babies whose scrapes I'll kiss. 

My friends say that it's bad to constantly want, that it only brings unfulfilled yearning into a life easily satisfied with acceptance. But isn't it great to want more? To strive for something outside of what you've already accomplished? It's so beautiful and vulnerable that humans want.

Two years ago I was really sad and I turned away from a lot of things I loved, including this blog. This site which proved to me that it is possible to wholeheartedly love strangers. When I type I erase a lot of my thoughts because it's so hard to verbalize what came naturally a long time ago. Sometimes it hurts. I think it's rusty fingers along with unexplained thoughts. It makes me sad but it also makes me want to return back to that girl with so many ideas and a lot of love, love for everything.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about the future of this blog; where I want to go with it. In a way it really is a reflection of me and what I've been doing for the past six years. I've thought about the things I've done in the past that make me happier today and I realized that cutting out this site wasn't one of them. I miss writing and I want to make this site into the little home it used to be, the home with a single bed and table but a lot of books and big windows. A little fixing up and we'll almost be back to new.

xx, T. 

9 comments:

  1. Everyone needs an outlet, and if writing is yours, don't ever give up on it! (Especially since you're pretty good at it.)

    Wanting is the human condition - don't let it destroy your life, or make you forget to live what you have, but of course you should always be striving.

    I look forward to seeing more and I'm glad you aren't giving up - there would be a lot of disappointed readers!

    http://lasaloperie.blogspot.com
    http://8questionsblog.blogspot.com

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  2. Love this post, sounds like we want similar things! Looking forward to following your journey there x

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  3. I enjoyed reading this post, it is beautifully written. Looking forward to reading more from you! :)

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  4. like billy joel once said, "only fools are satisfied"... always keep wanting (so long as you're grateful!)
    xx
    www.vicariousLA.com

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  5. Keep the dream alive! Keep wanting and be grateful for we have. Got my eye on your next posts.

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  6. im glad you decided to come back. i've been a long-time follower of your blog. i visit it even when you weren't posting anything anymore. Was pleasantly surprised to find new posts. Keep it up :)

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  7. i get this totally. i was so caught up with the corporate world and money chasing and i stopped writing and appreciating.

    i'm glad you're back. im sure you'll be really great.

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  8. i think its great that your back! I have often gone back and re read old posts because I missed your thoughts/ideas so much. Through your posts I discovered a lot and I just want to say thanks for coming back and having such good natural taste and flare. Keep writing. Keep inspiring!

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